Hitting the Road: Chapter 2
In chapter 1, I asked you to consider what it’s like to operate on “your road.” It’s that way of being that just feels right. It seems like that should be an easy question, but the truth tells us otherwise. Well-intentioned forces – both in and out of our control – are working to sap our energy, our creativity, and even our sense of ownership over our own destiny.
So, it’s vital that we learn to look for the signs that show us the way to our road, especially when the going gets tough. We know these signs because we each created them along the way. The trick is remembering what they look like.
Early in my remarketing days, after starting my career in the IT consulting world, I remembered feeling out of my depth. Confronted by new information, jargon, people, and business issues, no small amount of doubt crept in, with questions like: Am I in the right place? Do I belong here? How do I catch up to all these industry veterans? What authority do I have here?
Questions like these sound honorable and come from humble intentions, but they are also signs that we’ve veered off road. They are signs that we’ve handed the driving responsibilities to others; one of the fastest ways to lose our road.
Signs are Everywhere
The good news is that our signs are everywhere once we get better at looking for them. When fear, doubt, and uncertainty show up, they are often pointing us to the wrong side of the right sign. For example, “Am I in the right place?” becomes “Do I have a sense for where I’m headed?” That’s the Destination sign.
“Do I belong here?” becomes “How does my wisdom, experience, and perspective align with this opportunity?” That’s the Values sign.
“How do I catch up to all these industry veterans?” becomes “Is this the growth opportunity I want right now?” That’s the Growth sign.
“What authority do I have here?” becomes “How am I in charge of my own destiny right now?” That’s the Ownership sign.
Here’s Your Sign
Remember the “here’s your sign” bit by the comedian Bill Engvall? It was a classic that skewered people who blurted out the first question that popped in their head before they had a chance to see the obvious. Here’s the thing – we do this all the time in life. We sense. We react. We tell ourselves a story. Our brain means well, but that story often sabotages us. We pretend, we perform, we fawn, freeze, fight, or flee. We follow the first sign we see, and it takes us off our road.
Putting it in Practice
I invite you to try this on for size. Let your next few meetings be an exercise in looking for signs. Someone asks you to do something out of your comfort zone, or for an update that you don’t have. Perhaps you hear unexpected news from a teammate or client and feel some uncertainty or doubt creep in. Take a beat. Spot the story. Read the sign. Flip it.
“I always get stuck doing this,” can turn into: “I’m really good at this, so they keep asking me to do it. What can I do to hand this off to someone more appropriate?” Ownership.
“They are going to think that I’m unprepared or don’t care,” becomes: “This is more important to them than it was to me. How can I respond in a way that honors their needs and my responsibilities?” Values.
“They are smarter than me,” can turn into: “There’s a lot to learn from these folks, and people enjoy helping others. My fresh perspective will help them articulate their needs in a simpler way that’s beneficial to all – and they will feel heard.” Growth.
Remembering the signs that guide us, like signals pointing toward ownership, values, and growth, is a vital step in reframing our everyday experience and staying on our road.
So, what are your road signs?
Joe Miller is the Founder of Awareness to Action Coaching where he empowers our industry and the community with coaching and content for current and future leaders. After 15 years in the heart of our industry as an executive at AutoIMS, Joe brings a unique understanding of the remarketing industry and a passion for helping leaders reach their potential. You can see more of Joe’s content on LinkedIn or schedule time with him directly or contact Joe with questions.